


Don't Leave Me Behind

by captainchristen



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Hints of OT3, Multi, i just really love carmilla and danny okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2014-12-03
Packaged: 2018-02-28 01:23:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2713787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainchristen/pseuds/captainchristen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You were wrong, Perry.” Danny whispered brokenly to the open air. “I’m not selfless. I didn't just save her for Laura. I saved her for me too.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Leave Me Behind

**Author's Note:**

> My thoughts on what Danny was thinking and feeling when she carried Carmilla to Laura. Not my best, but its late, so whatever.

The last thing Carmilla remembered seeing was Laura’s face as Carmilla jumped into the light.

Days later, Carmilla awoke, still in the pit. She was teetering on the precipice of consciousness. Her senses are fuzzy. She vaguely feels the sensation of two strong arms as they lifted her from the ground. They are cradling her to their chest and they are walking. Carmilla registers where the arms are: one across her back, one under her knees. Carmilla can also feel her head leaning against the person’s chest. Carmilla absentmindedly thought it was an angel, lifting her from the pits of hell. She felt safe now, cradled like a child in the arms of a stranger. Carmilla wanted to see the face of this person; this person who could make her feel so protected and at peace after all that Carmilla had experienced. Carmilla successfully attempts to crack her eyes open, and looks up to see the face of her rescuer.

Carmilla looked up and found herself in the arms of Danny Lawrence.

Carmilla is confused, however a part of her is elated that Danny survived the battle. Carmilla just lays there, in Danny’s arms, looking up at her in slight awe. _I thought we hated each other… I guess I was wrong._ Carmilla thought as her lips quirked up in a small smile. Carmilla opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. Her throat was scratchy and dry. Carmilla tried again, and a noise resembling a groan tumbled out, catching Danny’s attention. Carmilla attempted to speak “D-Dan..?” she said, her voice hoarse and almost inaudible.

Danny quickly turned her head to Carmilla when her ears registered the vampire’s soft voice. Danny’s eyes furrowed in concern as she looked at Carmilla, her legs picking up their pace. “I’m here, Carmilla. I’ve got you.” Danny pulled Carmilla closer to her chest, her protective instincts kicking in. She willed her legs to go faster. _Come on, come on! Almost there._ Danny thought as she broke out into a run. They needed to get to Laura’s room. _Of course, the Lustig building had to have been all the way across campus._ Danny turned her attention back to Carmilla. “You’re safe now, we won. We beat your mother.” Danny could see Carmilla’s eyes liven up at those words.

“Laura…? W-where is… Laura? Carmilla asked weakly. She could feel herself losing consciousness, she could feel herself falling back into darkness.

“She’s okay, Carmilla. She’s okay. I’m taking you to her, okay?” Danny reassured. Danny didn’t understand it, but feelings of protectiveness and caring and… _something else_ were beginning to creep up.

“I need to… to see Laura.” Carmilla said desperately. Danny could see Carmilla struggle to stay awake. Danny started to accelerate her legs even more, until she was sprinting toward the direction of Laura’s dorm. “Damnit Carmilla, hold on! Don’t you dare die and leave us both, you stupid vampire!” Danny screamed at the girl curled up in her arms.

When Carmilla heard those words, she smiled. “I’m not going anywhere, Xena… Not again.” She said as she closed her eyes and nuzzled her nose into the fabric of Danny’s shirt.

Danny looked at the brunette, realizing she looked so tiny and vulnerable and _cute._ “You better not, blood sucker,” Danny said with a gentle smile. “Because Laura needs you. I... I need you.” She said softly. The taller girl looked at the Carmilla, looking to gauge a reaction to her words, but instead found her cuddling into Danny’s chest. The redhead smiled as a warm feeling spread through her heart. _Affection._ Danny absently noted. _Love..?_ She questioned, before she pushed it to the back of her mind. She needed to get her priorities straight. Carmilla laid there, in Danny’s arms, allowing Danny’s strong yet frantic heartbeat resound and echo in her ear, lulling her to sleep.

Danny saw this and cursed under her breath. She looked down at the sleeping girl in her arms, concern filling her eyes. Carmilla was not going to die, not when they just got her back. “I am _not_ losing you again, Carmilla. Not if I have a chance to save you.”

Finally, Laura’s dorm came into view. As the redhead rushed to the door, she thought _I am not letting you down again, Carmilla. Not this time, I promise._  Danny pushed herself harder, and soon she was running through the halls, frantically yelling Perry and LaFontaine’s names. Soon Perry came rushing toward her.

“Danny! Are y-Is that Carmilla?!” Perry shrieked, her mouth agape in shock.

“Perry, go ahead and warn Laura, I don’t know how she might react to this…” Danny said, looking away briefly. She could feel Carmilla grow limper in her arms. Danny barked, “Go, Perry! Please, she’s getting weaker! We can’t lose her again!”

Upon hearing Danny’s frantic voice, Perry snapped out of it and raced to Laura’s room. Danny was hot on her heels, careful to pull Carmilla’s head closer to her chest to avoid injuring her further. Soon Danny arrived at Laura’s, seconds behind Perry. Danny came into the room carrying Carmilla, and then laid her down on Laura’s bed as she said “Okay, sorry easy-bake, she’s heavier than she looks.” Once depositing Carmilla on the bed, Danny, along with Perry moved away from the bed to give Laura some space.

“Carm!” Laura cried in surprise.

“So she seems dead, but she’s a vampire, right?” Danny said, halfheartedly attempting to conceal her worry and concern.

Laura ran to the fridge. “Blood! She needs blood!” Laura scrambled to get the blood container, ran back to the bed and frantically put it to Carmilla’s lips. “Please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead!” Laura gasped in relief when Carmilla began to stir and sit up. Danny and Perry watched in the background, worry evident on their faces.

All three waited in baited breath until Carmilla spoke, “Well, that was a kick.” At those words Laura ran to the vampire and crushed her in a hug. When Danny saw this she looked away, a heavy feeling settling over her heart. Danny’s mind started reeling with questions. _Why do I feel like this? I feel… jealous. Of_ both _of them. There doesn’t seem to be any room in their relationship for me._ Danny thought as she heard Laura speak to Carmilla.

 “Hey.”

“Hey.”

Carmilla and Laura were looking at each other like they were the most precious thing in the world. Danny could feel her heart break, the ache deep and painful in her chest. Danny looked away, until she was spurred from her thoughts with Perry rushing them towards the door. The tall girl felt tears prick at the backs of her eyes, but she held them in. She followed Perry’s lead out the door to give the other two girls their privacy.

They were met with an empty hall. Once the door closed shut, Perry turned to Danny, saying that she had to run off to make sure LaF was doing alright. “Thank you for saving Carmilla. I know you didn’t really like her, but you made her and Laura very happy. You’re very selfless.” Perry said, rubbing Danny’s arm and giving her a smile. Danny nodded, concealing the inner turmoil she was feeling inside.

Once she was sure Perry had disappeared, Danny let her back slide down the wall, until she was sitting on the floor outside Laura and Carmilla’s room. Danny pulled her knees up to her chest and she held her head in her hands. “Shit…. Shit…” Danny swore softly, gripping tightly at her hair. She could feel her chest convulse and constrict. Danny attempted to swallow the growing lump in her throat. Danny could vaguely hear giggling floating from Laura’s door.

“You were wrong Perry.” Danny whispered brokenly to the open air. “I’m not selfless. I didn’t just save her for Laura. I saved her for me too.” Danny allowed an audible sob to leave her throat, hearing it echo throughout the empty hallway. “I love her too. I’m in love with both of them.” Danny admitted. Danny buried her head in her hands, attempting to mute her cries. She laid her head in her hands and let the tears fall. Her body shook with silent sobs. There, alone in the hall, outside the room the two girls she loved shared, Danny Lawrence sat silently weeping.

As long as Danny has lived, she has always been praised for her big heart. She had a hero complex, yes, but that was only due to the sheer love she felt for those she held close to her heart. She was brave, and caring, and somewhat stubborn, but she had always thought her best quality was the size of her heart.

_But,_ Danny thought, hearing Laura and Carmilla laugh happily through the door, _I suppose my love is not enough. It never is enough. I’m never enough._ Danny sat there for a long while, and when her cries subsided, she slowly rose to her feet and went on her way, heading towards the forest to train. That was all she could do, train until the pain went away. Danny gave one last look to Laura’s door before she went on her way. Perhaps one day she will finally get over those two, but until then, all Danny could do was be there for them. So she would. When the door was finally beyond Danny’s sight, she allowed herself to think _No matter how big my heart is, it still wasn’t enough._

Danny allowed herself to picture the faces of Carmilla and Laura in her minds eyes, and then she took off, their faces burned into her memory. She couldn’t love them, but she could fight for them. She could protect them. Danny dashed toward the forest, only one thought left on her mind.

_As long as you both are happy._


End file.
